Category: LOL Moments

Nurse: I want to check the results on a urine culture. Me: That specimen was submitted earlier today so there are no results yet. Nurse: But I ordered it STAT and the doctor is waiting on the results. Me: Cultures require an incubation period and take time to grow so they are not considered a… Continue reading Urine Culture STAT

I had a nurse call for the results of a blood culture 2 hours after it was collected! I told her it takes 5 days to be completed (faster if it turns up positive). She said “But it was ordered STAT!” I said “Oh, I didn’t realize that. I will put Miracle Gro on it”… Continue reading Miracle Grow Fix

Long time ago when I was a phlebotomist, I went into a room and asked the patient what his name was. He said, "Watt". Then I asked again, "What's your name?". Again, he said, "Watt". This went on for a while before I realized his last name was Watt!!! 🤣 🤣 🤣 Submitted by:Carol SteinbockMedical… Continue reading Watt’s Your Name?

Nurse: “How long does a sed rate take”?  Me: (we have the analyzer that does them in 20 minutes) “20 minutes from when we receive it”  Nurse: “What if it’s stat”?  Me: 20 minutes  Nurse: On a stat too?  Me: You do know i can’t speed up a test where we are literally measuring a… Continue reading STAT Sed Rate

Many, many years ago in the early 70s when we were allowed to smoke in the lab, one of the male techs used to smoke a cigar. Most of the time it wasn’t lit, he would just keep it in his mouth. One day, we took the cigar dipped it in gentian violet and put… Continue reading Gentian Violet

We used to do sterility testing for the bone bank. Of course, we called any positives to them. So there's Randy calling a positive donor bone. He says... 'Hi, this is Randy. I have a boner' ... His head drops as we howl in the background and he says... 'I'll call you back'. OMG... still… Continue reading I Have A Boner

This happened back in my home country where I took my first job as a Medical Technologist. At the time, I was a Med Tech Intern and was assigned a month at our Clinical Microscopy Department. The lab wasn't huge, but we have a fair share of patients, including some newborns. Some weren't even named… Continue reading Name Confusion

One day I came to work and there was a turd on the floor. Nobody knew where it came from. After a bit of investigating, we finally found out what happened. We had an H. pylori stool antigen test, and the preferred source was fresh frozen stool. Somehow, we had an escapee and we finally… Continue reading Literal Loose Stool

Years ago when I worked at a trauma center during the night shift, I had to go to ER and draw some blood on a lady. When I was done, she asked me where her boyfriend was. I didn’t know so as I was leaving trying to get back to the lab, there was this… Continue reading Skateboard Dare

My mom has a former nurse friend who worked in the ER. A man came in who had a vegetable stuck 'up there'.  After it was removed and he left, the nurses had to check it out. It was a potato that had been CARVED into a phallus! You cannot make this stuff up! Submitted… Continue reading Stuck Up Vegetable