Category: LOL Moments

A patient brought in a stool sample to the lab. The stool container was so tight that I used much force to open it up. The poop got out too and jumped out! We tried searching for it, but we couldn't find it. At tea break, I reached into my lab coat pocket and found… Continue reading Missing Poop

That one time I took a call from a guy who needed to collect a post vas semen specimen. He was very nervous: "Ummm, I need to give a, um, sample" I basically had to say the words for him. Me: "A semen sample?" Him: "Yes! Do I need to make an appointment?" Me: "Nope,… Continue reading Post Vas Appointment

I was working the outpatient desk one day when a patient came in carrying a little red stool. I asked him if I could help him and he handed me the stool. He told me that the doctor told him if he had a red stool to bring it to the lab as soon as… Continue reading Red Stool

A patient was supposed to do a set of stool samples in a parapak.  I wrote out full instructions about catching the stool in a clean container with no urine, scooping it into each vial of preservative, labeling them and bringing them back, etc.  I made him sign the directions to show he had read them and… Continue reading Tough Instructions

Not me, but a former coworker. Years ago, before phlebotomy teams, we techs had to go to the hospital floors for timed collections, predominantly finger stick hematocrits. One evening my coworker walked into a room packed with a big Italian family visiting the patriarch. She got nervous and mixing up her words stated: “Mr. G,… Continue reading Finger Your Prick

I received a swab for bacterial culture that had no source written on it.   Nurse was called to find out source and their reply was “skin”.   I had to explain that since the entire outer surface of the human body is covered in skin I was really gonna need a much more specific source. Submitted… Continue reading Specimen Source: Skin

I got a call from a nurse who wanted to know if she could add on a stool culture to the sample we had received earlier for C.diff.  I said, "Sure! Just put in the add on request." I pulled sample and set up the stool culture.  2 hrs later, she sends a new stool sample on the… Continue reading Repeat Stool Culture

Nurse from the ER calls and asks “What is the normal range on a blood alcohol?" I thought it was a joke so I paused and didn’t say anything for a moment.  Then I heard and irritated voice say “Well, don’t you know?" I responded ”Zero, there is no normal amount of alcohol ever found in… Continue reading What’s Normal?

I had a paramedic draw blood for me one day. He came up to me after and said, “the gold tube clotted, so I threw it out.” I looked at him a little sideways and said “the clot tube clotted?” He didn’t catch it and actually repeated back, “Yeah. The clot tube clotted so I… Continue reading Clot Tube Clotted

One day as I was processing pap smears, I received specimens with unlikely heath histories. First one was from a patient whose age is like 52, LMP is listed as postpartum. Unusual but not unheard of. Next patient from the same clinic is 68 and also "postpartum". I know for certain something is up. Called… Continue reading Postpartum Specimens